Life's a Cabaret For a Phenomenal Woman


NYC has always pushed me from inside to a forced excavation of the world around me. At first, I hated and feared it. Now I’m part of it

In the past, I spent time in the city when going through transitional stages, like the time I lived with my mother before eloping to Mississippi, or the time I stayed with my sister before moving to Portland, Maine. NYC was always my launching pad, the “get ready for the new stage in your life,” kind of place. Still, the city scared me, so I never stayed too long. Really, I didn’t believe I belonged there.  In NYC, my imagination was overcharged and raw, and I never knew how to flow with its purpose, intention and inspiration. Still, when things were changing, I returned there - if only for a brief moment.  Now, NYC was calling me back

Some months ago, my mother had a stroke. Subsequently, she was put into nursing in the Upper East Side, a nice, clean place, with activities for the elderly, field trips and wonderful caring people. At first, I resented traveling so far to visit her, but I was determined not to leave her alone for too long, so I made it a goal to take a bus out of Portland, Maine every two weeks to be with her. Initially, being in the city was a drag, but then I changed my mind-set about the place, incorporated its surprises and activities along with my visits to my mother.

On my last visit, NYC was magical.  Because, I didn’t have the money to see a play or eat a fancy dinner or buy drinks at a bar, I did a poor man’s version of city touring: I took strolls in its most famous parks, Prospect Park and Central Park; visited the amazing 9/11 memorial; snapped pictures of the Empire State Building; walked along fancy Madison and Lexington Avenues; took in the maddening pace around Wall Street; read billboard of plays on Broadway, making mental notes of those I wanted to see later on; and sneaked peeks at train passengers, imaging their lives.

Something shifted, New York City had become mine, and I discovered its biggest secret: Know who you are the city will roll out its red carpet to you. This time, I was no longer the scattered, scared visitor with no understanding of what was happening. I was a phenomenal woman taking in the city’s smells, pace, sounds, sights and adding them to my one-of-a kind memories.  It felt special, and I felt comfortable in my own skin, even in the rush of city life.  I was no longer a stranger in town, but instead, an honored guest at one of the world’s greatest parties. Passerbys gave me admiring glances and men asked me out on dates. Every night, I cheered my day’s adventures with a glass of red wine.

It hasn’t been easy arriving at place I know how to be, feel, think, regardless of where I am or who I'm with.  I’ve had to survive and thrive after a rocky childhood, divorce, dating, breakups, raising children, starting again, and reinventing myself. But, I’ve decided to live a phenomenal life anyway and being in NYC this last time, celebrated that conviction.

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