Brian,
When we
first met I broke your heart, but in
breaking your heart I broke my own.
At the time, I was too young to understand who you were and what you
meant to me. What can you tell a 20-year-old about true love? That it stays with you even when you can’t
see it even when you reject it. I didn’t know that then.
Being young, I wanted to go to bars and hang-out with girlfriends. I thought love would wait for me; that I would find it whenever and with whomever I wanted. For the three wonderful months we shared, you were patient and loved me in spite of all my
thoughtlessness. But your kindness,
sweetness, and respect scared me away.
Because your love was larger-than-life, it took 11 years for me to prepare for it.
Because your love was larger-than-life, it took 11 years for me to prepare for it.
All the time
I’ve been away from you, I’ve missed you every day.
I can’t say I’m proud of the choices I made in past
relationships. They’ve been painful and
hard, and they’ve reminded me of what I lost in you.
I thought I would have to keep looking forever
to find the three wonderful months we shared--the laughs,
respect, and understanding.
For 11
years, I settled on finding bits and pieces of you in the men I met--your big smile, goofiness, kindness.
Then three months ago, I found you on the internet.
I know now you never left me; that I’ve always loved you; and that I'm lucky to have a second chance at love with you. When you hear about people who find each other after long absences you think it’s a fluke, one of those things that just happens. But I've realized it “just happens“ when you’re ready to love and be loved, when you know what's real and meaningful, and when you're brave enough to recognize it.
I know now you never left me; that I’ve always loved you; and that I'm lucky to have a second chance at love with you. When you hear about people who find each other after long absences you think it’s a fluke, one of those things that just happens. But I've realized it “just happens“ when you’re ready to love and be loved, when you know what's real and meaningful, and when you're brave enough to recognize it.
I’m not scared to love you anymore, Brian. I just needed time to realize I never stopped loving you,
Claire
Read My Exciting Memoir, "The Continent of Ruby," available at: http://www.amazon.com (Because sometimes love, hate, living and dying all feel the same)
Read My Exciting Memoir, "The Continent of Ruby," available at: http://www.amazon.com (Because sometimes love, hate, living and dying all feel the same)
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